Culture Swoon

I can't even see straight I'm so deep into this pop culture apex: Tina Brown on Princess Diana. Brown's book, The Diana Chronicles, is out soon. I'm positively stupid with anticipation. Get me to a B&N quick! NPR's interview with The Right Reverend Culture Mistress (Brown) on the most dazzling pop culture icon ever (Diana) is here. More yummy online goodies such as a book excerpt are there too.

As if that wasn't enough, Jim Long's "new media style" MSNBC package about how to cover Pentagon global photo ops in seven days is here. I gotta ask... the package is tons of fun, but it really points to the elephant in the room: where's the beef? All that network money for a bunch of glamor video shots of Sect. Gates? Where were the live bloggers with the real news? HINT: on Twitter, maybe?!

NOTE TO SELF: Get better highlights. Pay out the ass for 'em if you have to. Buy hair gloss too.

Diana - The Gift That Keeps On Giving

Had I know she'd be with us for an eternity of intrigue, I wouldn't have mourned her untimely death so grievously. Now here's some good dirt: Seems the Secret Service was tapping Diana's phones at the Ritz the night she died. Did she reject WJC's advances in the past at some state function? Was this a vengeful obsession of the then POTUS to track her every hot globe-trotting date? My my my... read all about it here.

Little Black Cloud In A Dress

Diana had to have it all -- she desired our facilities and institutions, and pined, to her butler, to be our First Lady, chiefly just to give the finger to her ex-in-law QE2 on returning state visits to Buckingham Palace.

Whew... could that gal work herself into a vengeful, wacko frenzy or what?! Still, Di as First Lady could have been dazzling, and buying her way in with a wealthy husband was one of her more reasonable ideas, given our pay-to-play system of government.

Diana as First Lady would sure have beat having the First Zombie we do now. What an utter dud Laura Bush has turned out to be. I guess I'd have to be drugged-up on anti-depressants, as she often appears to be, if I was married to this Chief Dim-Wit, too.

With her fixation on Pakistan and that handsome Pakistani doc, Diana could have been their sovereign; then she might have helped patrol the ludicrously porous border with Afghanistan. Now there's a job for a good, psycho princess.

Of course when one ponders the shitheap that is Afghanistan, one can't help but draw the obvious parallel to the ellusive adventures of that other cute terrorist, Eric Rudolf, running loose through the tangle of our wild, southern mountain ranges for five freakin' years. Rudolf wasn't toting a new media production facility along with him, though. Traveled solo, traveled light. Still, the Feds caught his sorry ass in the long, millions and millions later, run.

I am a little concerned for Anderson Cooper's safety over there chasing Osama. He sure likes to stand real close to those howitzers. One of those military menz is gonna get real pissed with the cutie pie in the fake fatigues getting too close to his biz and fire that thing right into AC's adorable ass.

This post put together by The Shins' Chutes Too Narrow.