Friday, December 08, 2006

No Panties? They Have No Hair!

So the Uber Sluts, Britney and Lindsay, get snapped without their undies. So what. What they're missing is their freakin' hair!

Having once made the painful mistake of having it all ripped-off, in a ludicrous language barrier breakdown of communication between me and a well-meaning but illiterate Vietnamese salon gal, all I can say is NEVER again. Not only is it extremely painful, utter pandering to the latest sex trend, you only end-up looking like a pitiful, naked hamster.

My experience in extreme waxing only brought about a highly unusual bout of self-loathing and a (temporary) revert to a juvenile, hyper-obsession with one's body parts. I hate that my normally robust ego had to suffer that way. Never again.


This post put together to Patty Griffin's Impossible Dream.
All you kids get out the back door. I've never seen her this way before.

6 comments:

Amber said...

WTF is with this headline:

"Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan Sluts?"

Grrrr...

In other news, I have had a bikini wax a grand total of once. And I say, fuck that noise. Just my personal preference, of course... but damn.

Grayson said...

Who wrote that anti-woman crap? Me? How about Uber Toads then??

Amber said...

Oh I wasn't growling at you. I was growling in general.

Tania Rochelle said...

A friend of mine, a social worker who's worked extensively with sexual offenders, suggests that the predilection for bald vajayjays comes from the porn industry--that when you're looking at two-dimensional images, you can't really "see" the good stuff unless you remove all the obstacles. Thus, she reasons, began the trend--that desire for real-life baldies.

I worry, however, that it's really about youth and innocence--that men really just want "a little girl." It creeps me out.

Amber said...

I worry, however, that it's really about youth and innocence--that men really just want "a little girl." It creeps me out.

I used to buy that line - until I realized, we don't apply that same creepiness factor to shaving any other part of the body. The same could very well be said about shaving one's legs or armpits, or a man shaving his face. An adult with shaven genitals doesn't look like a child any more than an adult with shaven legs or a shaven face does.

possum said...

It would be utterly inappropriate for a gentleman to comment on this subject.